Categorized as: domestic violence

How To: 6 Diva Tips for Stopping Stalkers

Did You Know One in Six Women Will Be A VICTIM of stalking?

Let me guess, you thought only celebrities had stalkers? Think again!

This growing epidemic which often leads to violence or murder, finally received its National recognition. On December 31, 2013, President Obama declared January as Stalking Awareness Month.

Here are 8 tips for you to protect yourself from being a victim of stalking:

1. Put a lock on your life!

Technology, although helpful, is a gateway to multiple types of crimes. We are often overly concerned with remembering our passwords, that we create less secure ones for our own comfort.
Create passwords that have high levels of security. Microsoft suggests having passwords with at least eight characters which DO NOT contain complete words.

2. They’re Free Anyway.

“Nothing in life is free.” Well, email can be! Using a simple “free email addresses” search on the web, we were able to find the “Top 11 Free Email Services” as of last month. Use multiple seperate email accounts for various purposes: personal bills and finances; a “sign up” account (for things you “sign up” for on the web); correspondence with family and friends; business

3. There Are No Reservations, You Do Not Have To Check In!

It’s understood how exciting it can be to stay social, using “selfies” and streaming video to connect with friends on the web. We strongly encourage not using the “check-in” feature on various apps to give your location until you are ready to depart. Apps like these keep an accurate account of your most visited areas making it easy to track and locate you.

4. Shredding Is Not Only For Cheese.

As hard as we try to be an eco-friendly Nation with electronic versions of everything; truth is, we still use paper. It would be understandably simple to mistake an overdue bill as junk mail when struggle is present. This is one of those good news, bad news scenarios. Good news: This too shall pass. Bad news: Personal Information and/or Identity Theft Invest in protecting your personal information, your local office supply store has inexpensive shredders (preferably one that shreds expired credit cards also)… Go get one!

5. Okay, You Are Cute! Now Put Your Badge Away!

If you are no longer at work, please take off your darn work badge. Do you realize having your name and workplace as a personal billboard is potentially life threatening? Someone can pose as a utility provider, mail man or jogger and have only those two things for you to feel comfortable enough to let down your guard if only for a few seconds. By calling your name and identifying where you work as a way to “me too” with you; those few seconds you are attempting to sort through your mental Contacts can allow an attacker to force his way into your home or you into his car.

6. Safeguard Your Smartphone

It’s funny how dumb our smartphones make us. Cell phones have evolved from a novelty to a necessity to many of us. Both parents and teens developed a dependency on them divulging every aspect of our lives willfully. It possesses our most personal photos; communication with family and friends and even our daily finances. If you could print all the information from your phone and put it in front of you, you would buy a vault to protect it. Add a simple pass code on your phone PIN, swipe or password to make your life line less accessible.

Find out how to “Prevent Your Ex From Cyber-Stalking

Domestic Violence Awareness Month

October is Domestic Violence Awareness month. This is a time for us to come together as a community to promote awareness of Domestic Violence. This is not a problem for one woman but for many women in our communities. Domestic Violence does not discriminate but affects every socioeconomic status and culture and is the leading cause of injury for women. Take this opportunity to stand up for those that have lost their lives in preventing Domestic Violence from happening to others. Here are a few ways that you can join the movement and take a stand.

1.  Empower yourself. Empower yourself and your loved ones with the facts about Domestic Violence and how they can help. Click here for more information.

2.  Participate in local Domestic Violence Awareness events. Check local listings for Domestic Violence Awareness events in your area and volunteer for these events.

3. Purple ribbon campaign. The purple ribbon is the recognized ribbon for Domestic Violence. Wear and distribute purple ribbons to friends, family and leaders in your community.

4. Purple Purse Campaign. Join AllState and YWCA Purple Purse Campaign.

5. Conduct a cell phone drive. Join Verizon by joining their HopeLine campaign. Donate your no longer used phone to a Verizon Wireless Store or through the mail. Click here to learn more.

6.  Donate. Donate monetary gifts, gift cards or hygiene items to a local Domestic Violence shelters in your area. Many victims of domestic violence leave their homes without proper funding, hygiene and clothes for their family.

Divas in Defense Partners with The Call

We were excited to partner with Gofobo and Sony Pictures to promote the new movie, The Call, that opens in theaters today. The Call is a thriller starring Halle Berry and Abigail Breslin about a 911 operator (Berry) that receives a call from a girl (Breslin) that has just been abducted. We had the privilege to partner with local organizations at Oglethorpe University and Georgia State University to promote the movie and teach students self defense techniques. We discussed ways to avoid abduction and other violent crimes.

Students were then given safety flashlights and movie passes to attend a movie screening of The Call prior to opening day. This movie is why we are passionate about what we do here at Divas in Defense. Bringing awareness to these types of issues may save your life one day.

Interested in hosting a class at your school? Contact us today.

You Need A Man???

A teenage girl said to me, “I need a man.”
“Need a man?” I responded. “Well, what type of man do you need?”
Her reply was typical, “Tall, dark and handsome! Oh yeah, and no kids.”
I asked, “Are those your only qualifications?”
She said, “Of course not, he needs to have money.”
Flabbergasted, I questioned, “Is that all?”
Her reply was just as shocking. “No, he has to have his own money, a car and dress nice.”
Reaching my limit of tolerance to this superficial take on finding love, my response was simple:
“I can tell you what kind of man you need…
One that trusts in God despite hardship
One that will love you more than himself
One that educates you and not berates you
One that won’t use or abuse you
One that you can grow with, not apart from
One that can make you smile when you frown
One that needs you just the same
One that apologizes when he’s to blame
One that comforts you when you’re sad
One that does something romantic just because you are feeling bad
One that motivates you to be a better person
One that uplifts you when things worsen
One that compliments your shortcomings with achievement
One that your Father would call Son in agreement
One that would sacrifice his happiness for yours
One that provides til sweat bleeds from his pores
One that encourages you when you fail
One that each kiss feels like a fairy tale.”
Remember, the way one looks today can easily change tomorrow.

Divas in Defense Partners with Budget Car and Truck Rental of Atlanta to Teach Self-Defense and Cyberbullying Prevention at the Allstate/Tom Joyner Family Reunion

With children returning to school, it is imperative to educate children and their parents on social media etiquette, internet safety and cyberbullying prevention. In an effort to provide awareness and training, Divas in Defense has teamed with Budget Car and Truck Rental of Atlanta to provide self-defense training at the Allstate/Tom Joyner Family Reunion in Orlando Florida. This campaign consists of a series of self-defense presentations and classes. These classes include training on how to protect your identity against theft, warning signs of a child being bullied, proper “netiquette” when utilizing social media platforms.

Budget Car and Truck Rental of Atlanta has been locally owned and operated since 1977. Budget has 14 convenient metro Atlanta locations open 7 days a week to provide the best value in car rental while democratizing travel. Budget Atlanta offers a wide variety of rental vehicles from sedans to luxury cars, specialty and premium vehicles, SUVs, minivans, passenger vans, and trucks. Reservations and more information is available through their local website: BudgetATL.com. Budget Car and Truck Rental of Atlanta is to be commended for taking a stand against violence towards women and cyberbullying by providing transportation for Divas In Defense trainers to provide self-defense educational services. These are a set of classes FREE and OPEN to the public at the Gaylord Palms Resort in Orlando from August 30, 2012 through September 3, 2012. The classes target women and children with specific focus on teens and the issues they face.

Divas in Defense’s mission is to empower women of all ages with the training and tools imperative to their personal safety and the safety of their families. Through fun, instinctive learning; women gain the knowledge to protect and arm themselves while gaining confidence not to be the victims.

About Divas in Defense

Currently located in six states and Mexico, Divas in Defense provides self-defense for the “everyday” woman. From the athlete to the not-so- active, the businesswoman to the student, and the shy to the confident, our courses are intended to educate, promote awareness, build self-esteem and give women the physical and mental tools they need to detect, avoid and escape potentially violent situations. We also provide on-site corporate and private training programs, including specialty training seminars and presentations.

To bring Divas in Defense to your next event for a presentation or for a training session, please contact Divas in Defense at (877) 713-4343 or via email at

in**@di************.com











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Congressional Violence toward Women: Stop it Now!

In 1994, Former President Bill Clinton signed the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA), implementing pivotal legislation for victims of rape, domestic violence, dating violence, and stalking.  When President Clinton signed this act into law, he was working with a partisan legislature that was able to effectively serve the needs of the people in a bi-partisan way.  Today, President Obama faces a similar political dilemma, but there is no bi-partisan camaraderie to quell this issue. Specifically, women’s issues have entered the sparring ring as the latest issue of debate used to assumedly prevent President Obama’s reelection.  This is perhaps why most people are turned off by politics; but, it is all the more reason why people should be tuned in.  In September of 2012, this act will expire (did you ever think an expiration date applied to the protection of any citizens?) and is up for renewal.  Women’s issues have been a fundamental component in the debate to extend state’s rights, amend our healthcare system, and now, the women who need legal protection the most—vulnerable, esteem-destroyed, and fearful women—have to contend with the fact that this past week, the majority of the Republicans recently voted to weaken the Violence Against Women Act considerably.  Activist groups like NOW (The National Organization for Women) have condemned the House version of the bill due its lack of specificity and its exclusion of the very people it is intended to protect.

Women are not the enemy of the Republican Party, but then again, I guess we are, but so are the elderly, the poor, the young, the gays, and anyone else that had a hand in getting President Obama elected in the first place. Partisan politics is hurting the people and our nation!  We are at war with ourselves in a losing battle. And, women have been one of heaviest and most affected groups under attack as the nation inches one step closer to the November 6th election. Congress needs to stop this reckless display of assault and the citizens have to hold them accountable.  The Violence Against Women Act is just as important as having access to clean air and water. And, there is no negotiating it!  We need to talk about it, but more importantly we need to talk to our legislators about it.

Every link included in this blog is important to your knowledge on how you can be a better, more informed voter and citizen. America is will only be as good as we make it. Stevie Wonder, receiving the Billboard Icon Award on Sunday May 20th, 2012 said it best, “We are at a place [in society] where we have to commit ourselves to love.”  Women, as much as we claim to love ourselves, we have to really take the time to show it so that others can reciprocate that love.

Click on the following link to find out who your Congressmen / women are: http://www.whitehouse.gov

Click on this link provided by another read-worthy blog, The Root, to find out how the Violence Against Women Act is being stripped as reported by professor and MSNBC political commentator, Melissa Harris-Perry: http://www.theroot.com/buzz/mhp-violence-against-women-act-stripped

 Zakiyyah

Follow my blog: www.thepolidayreport.com

Follow me on twitter: DoItGurl

 

 

Marissa Alexander Sentenced: Florida Mom Who Shot At Abusive Husband Gets 20 Years In Prison

“Injustice Anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.” – Martin Luther King Jr.
Marissa Alexander, the 31-year-old Florida woman who fired what her family calls a warning shot at her abusive husband, was sentenced Friday morning to 20 years in prison.
Alexander was convicted of three counts of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon for firing into a wall near her husband and his two young children at their Jacksonville home in 2010. Alexander has maintained that she wasn’t trying to hurt anyone and that she was standing her ground against a man who had over the course of nearly a year punched and choked her on several different occasions. Alexander says that she believed she was protected that day under the state’s Stand Your Ground Law, which gives people wide discretion in using deadly force to defend themselves.
A judge and a jury disagreed.
The State Attorney’s Office offered a plea bargain that would have sent Alexander to prison for three years, but she rejected it, hoping to convince a jury that she had been defending herself when she fired the weapon.
Alexander’s case has become the latest battleground in a fight against what Alexander’s supporters call the misapplication of the Stand Your Ground Law and Florida’s mandatory minimum sentencing laws, which offer stiff sentences for crimes involving guns.
According to Florida’s 10-20-Life statutes, anyone who pulls a gun during a crime receives a mandatory 10-year sentence. Firing a gun during the commission of a crime equals a mandatory 20-year sentence. Anyone convicted of shooting and killing another person during a crime is sentenced to 25 years to life in prison.
Alexander, who did not have a criminal record before the shooting, was convicted of felony assault with a gun.
“Florida’s mandatory 10-20-life gun law forced the Court to impose an arbitrary, unjust and completely inappropriate sentence,” said Greg Newburn, Florida project director for Families Against Mandatory Minimums, a group that fights to repeal such laws. “As long as Florida keeps its inflexible gun sentencing laws, we will continue to see cases like Ms. Alexander’s.”
Alexander, a mother of three, and her family have vowed to keep fighting.
“It’s like a nightmare that we can’t wake up from,” Helen Jenkins, Alexander’s mother, told HuffPost shortly after the sentencing. “But we just take it one day at a time. Emotionally we are spent, but every day we start over because we have to fight for Marissa.”
Jenkins said the family is currently raising funds to hire another attorney to appeal Alexander’s case.
Angela Corey, the state attorney who oversaw the case against Alexander, said that justice was indeed served and that Alexander was angry and reckless, not fearful, on the night of the shooting. Just because no one was harmed in the incident doesn’t make the shooting any less a punishable crime, Corey said.
“I feel like when someone fires a loaded gun inside of a home with two children standing in the direction where the bullet was fired, we have to have tough laws that say you don’t do that,” Corey told HuffPost. “Justice, with the laws of the state of Florida, was served. But I don’t believe her supporters will ever believe that.”
The Jacksonville courtroom in which Alexander was sentenced was packed with Alexander’s family and supporters. At one point, according to news reports, a group of young supporters stood up and sang or chanted, “We who believe in justice will not rest!”
One by one, Alexander’s family members addressed the court, including Alexander’s mother and father, a sister and a brother who broke down in tears as they talked about their sister and how they believe the system had wronged her.
Alexander’s daughter, Havelin, 11, read from a letter she’d written and questioned “how my mom could be beaten but she’s the one arrested,” according to Lincoln Alexander, the girl’s father and Marissa’s ex-husband.
“That’s the reason why I’m fighting,” Lincoln Alexander told Huffpost. “I’m fighting for my kids … I knew this day was coming and my thoughts were on them. Would they be strong enough?”
If Alexander’s future appeals are unsuccessful, and she serves her full 20-year term in prison, her twins will be 31 years old when she is released. Her youngest will be 22.
“Today was another tough day for them,” Lincoln Alexander said of his kids. “Once they took Marissa away and we walked out of the court and everything was over, that’s when it was toughest.”
On Aug. 1, 2010, a fight between Alexander and her husband, Rico Gray, 36, left her cornered in the couple’s home. She fled into the garage to escape but was trapped behind a jammed door, she stated in court documents. She said she grabbed the gun she kept in the garage, returned to the house and, when Gray threatened to kill her, fired a single shot to ward him off.
Gray ran out of the house with his two sons and called the police. Alexander was arrested and charged. She unsuccessfully invoked her right to stand her ground in court. Alexander’s sentencing comes 435 days after the shooting. It took a jury 12 minutes to find her guilty.
Gray himself admitted in a deposition to abusing “all five of his babies’ mamas except one,” and to hitting Alexander. Alexander’s family and supporters say that Gray’s testimony should not be trusted, because he perjured himself by changing his account of events on the night of the shooting between his early depositions and later court hearings — a claim that was not disputed by Corey, the state attorney.
Alexander’s case has drawn comparisons to the case of Trayvon Martin, the unarmed black teenager shot to death in February by a neighborhood watch volunteer who claimed he shot Martin in self-defense. The shooter, George Zimmerman, was initially released after the police said he was within his legal rights to defend himself. He was later arrested and charged with second-degree murder more than 40 days later.
Both the Martin and Alexander cases have stirred controversy around Florida’s self-defense and gun laws, but it wasn’t until some media pivoted from the Martin case to Alexander’s that her name became known outside of Jacksonville.
Her family has set up a website and has appeared on cable news shows and nationally syndicated radio programs to spread the word about the “injustice” that they believe Alexander has suffered.
But in the past week, Angela Corey, the state attorney (who also is prosecuting Zimmerman in the Martin case), has launched a media offensive to combat what she has called “misinformation” being spread by the family about the circumstances of the shooting.
Shortly after the sentencing, Corey echoed comments she made to HuffPost earlier this week, saying that Alexander’s own actions on the night of the incident and in the following months have landed her in the position that she is in.
While Alexander’s family has portrayed her as a victim at the end of her emotional rope and in fear of her life, Corey says Alexander fired in anger and not in fear. Corey disputes the so-called warning shot into the ceiling with photographs that show bullet holes much lower, going through a kitchen wall and into the living room where Corey said Gray and his boys were.
“The fact that nobody got hurt has to be balanced with the fact that someone could have gotten hurt,” Corey said. “The kids being right next to him changed everything.”
About four months after Alexander was released on bail, on orders to have no contact with Gray, she got into an altercation with him at his home that gave him a black eye, Corey said. Alexander was arrested and charged with battery, to which she pleaded no contest.
Corey said that Alexander’s actions — engaging with a man of whom she claimed to be deathly afraid, and assaulting him — “didn’t show much of her being remorseful” or “being a peaceful person.”
“Everybody is still ignoring that she got out on bond and chose to go back over there and hit him a second time,” Corey said. “That was kind of an indication of where putting her on probation, where you might have been able to do that before, was off the table since she disregarded a judges order.”
Alexander’s family said the second incident took place just days before her newborn would have been dropped off of her insurance, and that she went over to Gray’s home to have him sign paperwork that would have kept the baby insured. The family say that he attacked her that night and provided HuffPost with her medical records, which show that she suffered minor scrapes and bruising on her face, hand and arm.
After the altercation, Alexander left Gray’s house, and Gray called the police.
On Friday Corey’s office provided a police report, photographs and a 911 call that counter Alexander’s claims.
In the police report, Gray claimed that Alexander came over to drop off their daughter, and that when he rebuffed Alexander’s request to spend the night, she “became enraged and began striking him on the face.” Gray said he raised his hands, the report continues, and he yelled out to his sons to call the police. The responding officer wrote that Gray’s children corroborated that account.
When the police contacted her an hour or so later, according to the report, she said she didn’t understand why they were contacting her and that she had an “alibi.” The police noted swelling and a cut under Gray’s left eye and no visible injuries on Alexander. But on the way to the jail, Alexander said she felt light-headed and became unresponsive.
An officer then “observed that there was a small cut under the suspect’s eye that was not there prior to her being placed in my back seat.”
Alexander was rearrested that night and has remained in custody ever since.

See original story HERE.

Women’s Rights In Turkey

Women’s Rights In Turkey

What a difficult story to read, given the account on the state of women’s rights in Turkey given the substantial efforts to achieve equality and security for millions of women. Turkey’s government has not only adopted far-reaching legislation that strengthens the authorities’ ability to prevent and prosecute violence against women, but it has also taken steps to ensure full implementation of these laws.They have intensified training and held numerous symposia and workshops, and even launched a broad public education program to raise awareness about women’s violence.

 

In Instanbul, a 37-year-old mother of two, has lived on the run for 15 years, ever since her abusive husband tracked her down, broke down her door and shot her in the leg six times after she refused to return to him. According to the women, she said her husband had since kidnapped her mother and stabbed her brother, trying to force them to reveal her whereabouts. She repeatedly turned to the police. But, she said, they chided her to return to her husband. On one account, after her husband came to pick her up at the police station, she said she heard an officer advise him to break her legs so she could not escape.

To read more about the articles, please visit: http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9A05EED71F39F93AA15757C0A9649D8B63&ref=domesticviolence

and http://www.nytimes.com/2012/05/03/opinion/womens-rights-in-turkey.html?ref=domesticviolence

U.S. Senate Passes Aid to Victims of Domestic Violence

The. U.S. Democrats are encouraging lawmakers in the Republican-led House to quickly pass legislation to reauthorize assistance and aid to victims of domestic violence. $660 million dollars was authorized through the year 2016 thanks to a 68-31 vote on the renewal of the 1994 Violence Against Women Act. This bill will assist in domestic violence shelters and police training.

A Nevada Democrat said, “Today’s strong bipartisan vote will give law enforcement agencies the tools they need to prosecute and convict the perpetrators of these heinous crimes, and will help victims get the protection and support they need.” This bill passed should have all the elements to help women, all victims and should improve the prosecution of these crimes.

Since 1994, domestic violence has dropped more than 50%. However, 1 in 3 women in the U.S. will experience rape, physical violence, or stalking by a partner.

To read more about this article, please visit http://www.businessweek.com/news/2012-04-27/u-dot-s-dot-senate-passes-aid-to-victims-of-domestic-violence

 

Rape victims say military labels them ‘crazy’

Here’s a very interesting story… ” Rape victims say the military labels them as ‘crazy’ “.

Four women were interviewed and although they joined different branches of the military they happen to share a very common experience. Stephanie Schroeder joined the U.S. Marine Corps, Anne Moore inlisted in the Army, while Jenny McClendon joined the Navy and Panayiota Bertziki was a member of the Coast Guard. Each of these women claimed they were raped, each received a psychiatric diagnosis and shortly thereafter, each were  discharged from the military after reporting a sexual assault.

-Schroeder claims a fellow Marine followed her into a bathroom, then began punching her, ripping her pants off and raped her.

-Moore says a non commissioned officer tried to rape her, but once she tried to report it, her first sergeant tore up her paperwork and basically told her to forget about it, as if it never happened.

-McClendon was raped by a superior. Soon after she reported it, she was diagnosed with a personality disorder and told she was unfit to serve.

-Bertziki was forced out of the Coast Guard while receiving an adjustment disorder diagnosis after reporting that she had been punched in the face and raped by a shipmate.

U.S. Defense of Secretary, Leon Panetta exclaims, “The number of sexual assaults in the military is unacceptable.”

In 2011 nearly 3,191 military sexual assaults were reported. However, given that most are not reported, the Pentagon estimates a little closer to 19,000!! How disturbing???

To read more about this story please go here.

Rape victims say military labels them ‘crazy’