abduction | Divas In Defense®

Safe Apps

Ten years ago, it was difficult to communicate to let family and friends know that you were safe. It was even more difficult to let them know you were in a unsafe situation. Now, we all have cell phones with GPS locators. This recent technology provides a safety net for cell phone users. The are multiple apps that provide ways to communicate with authorities, family and friends in emergencies or sketchy situations. Below are a few apps that are great additions to your current apps.

Watch Over Me

Watch Over Me greets you with a screen that presents two statements, ‘Watch Over Me While I…’ and ‘For…’, followed by two buttons. For each statement you fill in an action (‘walk home’, ‘walk to my car’, ‘take a cab’, ‘meet someone’, or add a new event), and a time frame . Once you’ve selected these specifics and tapped the ‘Watch Over Me’ button, the app takes you to a countdown screen with a round button to tap to confirm your safety, and a square button below it to tap to extend the watch session. If you don’t confirm your safety by the time the counter hits zero, the app contacts your previously designated friends (via SMS, email, or even Facebook) with your GPS location. Two other buttons remain constant throughout the app: the Instant Emergency Alert button, and a banner at the top that you can tap to unlock all the app’s features.

bSafe

bSafe has some of the same features as Watch Over Me—for instance, it allows you to add contacts (it calls them Guardians) who can follow you when you’re on your way home. Like the other apps, it has an SOS button that will set off an alert to your Guardians, with your GPS location. Once you’ve registered with bSafe, the app asks you to select Guardians from your contacts list. You’ll need to have at least one contact that can be reached via telephone; other Guardians can be accessible via text message or a combination of the two. If you’re in danger, hit the red SOS button, and the app sounds an alarm, sets off a bright light on your phone, texts your location to your contacts, and calls a Guardian.

Circle of 6

The design is simple. It takes two touches to get help, so no fumbling or digging around for the right number. The design ensures safety, speed and privacy. GPS is integrated (using Google maps), and is only activated by you, and sent to your own Circle of 6. It uses icons to represent actions, so that no one can tell what you’re up to if they see your phone.

1. Car icon: Come and get me. SMS message reads, “Come and get me. I need help getting home safely. My GPS coordinates are…”

2. Phone icon: Call me. SMS message reads, “Call and pretend you need me. I need an interruption.”

3. Chat icon: I need some advice. SMS message reads, “I’m looking for information, just letting you know.” This will link the user with risk-assessment tools and information about healthy vs. abusive relationships developed by content partners.

The Great “8” Spring Break Safety Tips

The Spring Break season is steadily approaching. This is the time where teens and family do lots of travelling. It is important for Spring Breakers to use caution and discretion when visiting different cities. Below are a list of tips provided to assist travelers to their vacation and back in the safest way possible.

Never leave valuables in plain view in your car. Lock items in your trunk before reaching your destination.
Before leaving your hotel, take a card from the front desk with the name of the hotel, phone number, and address, just in case you need help getting back. Also, put this information in your phone to be extra sure you have it.
All genuine taxis will have some sort of ID or badge. Check for this before accepting a ride.
If you ever feel unsafe, it is completely within your rights to abandon a taxi or any other ride service at a safe stop. Leave money behind on the seat and get out of there if you don’t feel safe.
Try to go the ATM in groups, but avoid getting overly complacent about safety just because you’re traveling in numbers.
When entering in your pin number, use your other hand or your body to cover the keypad. Just because you don’t see someone watching you doesn’t mean there couldn’t still be a camera capturing what you type.
When you check in at the front desk, use discretion in saying your room number out loud for anyone in the lobby to hear. No one outside of your group of friends needs to know your exact location.
Always keep an eye on your drink. If you go the bathroom, take your drink with you! Date rape drugs can be put into any drink, including non-alcoholic drinks. It is also important to remember that while drugs being slipped into drinks is something you should be aware of and guard against, alcohol itself is the most common date rape drug. In a 2007 study by the National Institute of Health, it was reported that 89% of female undergrad sexual assault survivors reported drinking before their assault. No survivor is to blame for their assault, but the links between alcohol and victimization are staggering and cannot be ignored.

Street Harassment the Uncomfortable Walk

Before reading those stories, and posting, I accepted it as the norm to get harassed all the time.” (Hollaback participant, 2012) –

Now we all can admit that hearing “That I Notice You” whistle or look might actually brighten up your day, but what can you do if it progresses into an uncomfortable situation: whistle blowing, hisses and the stares. Many do not understand what is the ‘Big Deal”. Non-contact unwanted sexual experiences were the most common form of sexual violence experienced by both women and men.

Event though the assailant is not being physical public harassment is still pretty close to your Personal Safety Zone. The assailant might not even notice they are speaking the language of Sexual Terrorism. It could all be apart of their Social Anxiety Defense Mechanism stemming from low self-esteem.

Street Harassment on College Campuses
Recently the company behind the Hollaback! App collected 282 undergraduate, graduate and part-time college students and 44 college administrators on campuses from the urban, suburban and rural U.S. to find out how harassment exists in spaces of higher education.
• Students are being harassed on their college campuses (67% of students experienced harassment),
• Harassment is limiting student’s ability to benefit from education,
• Current campus systems and processes are insufficient.
• Over 99 percent of women report facing some form of street harassment.
• 95 percent of women report being the target of leering or excessive staring at least once.
• More than 37 percent of women have had a stranger masturbate at or in front of them at least once in public.
• Nearly 57 percent of women reported being touched or grabbed in a sexual way by a stranger in public.
• Over 77 percent of women said they were the targets of kissing noises from men.
• About 62 percent of women say a man has purposely blocked their path at least once.
• About 27 percent of women report being assaulted at least once in public by a stranger.

“But I found myself forcing myself to bring it up and to tell people about it and to, even like, people I wouldn’t normally tell this to, like my Dad… Hollaback cultured my feeling that this should be shared.”
The only way we can become a fighting voice for all of those who cannot.

Sources: http://www.ihollaback.org/
SOURCES: Stop Street Harassment, Feministe/Patrick McNeil, Center for American Progress

No Good Deed Goes Unpunished

Like many of our Divas and especially our Atlanta Divas; who attended our Kicks & Flicks for this movie, I could not stop hearing about ‘No Good Deed’ and its plot.
As I sat with my mom in the theatre the question – Can this really happen? Popped up scene after scene.
We’ve all done it: answered the door, when we know we are not expecting anyone. Thank goodness for most of us, it is usually your friend, neighbor or postman. But what if they are not
In the first 10 minutes I saw a billion steps the main character played by Taraji P. Henson did absolutely wrong:

Here is a brief list just incase you missed the signs:
Open door for someone she wasn’t expecting.
Continue conversation with stranger then informed stranger that she was home alone
Left door unattended.
Invited stranger into the home.
Alarm pad not in use!!

The Divas In Defense team has put together a few hints so we can all avoid being caught on the wrong side of home invasions.

Know Thy Neighbor
The reason behind this is three-fold. Firstly, if you know the people who live around you, then you can tell much more easily if someone there is out of place. Also, in the event of an emergency, it’s a good idea to have at least one of your neighbor’s phone numbers (if not more) to reach out for help.

Stay Secure
There are many levels of prevention. There are the simpler measures (get a dog, which make for great deterrents; make sure doors have peep holes, and use them; make sure all locks are functional and that any outside fences are in good condition) to the larger ones (get an alarm that actually alerts a security service; install security cameras–even ones that are visible to any possible perps) to the really big guns (panic room, anyone?). Which of these you should employ ultimately depends on your personal circumstances, but all (or nearly all) of them are worth investigating.

When Precautions Fail

There are further measures you can take in the event someone does breach your home.

Have a pre-meditated escape plan: Know how you will quickly and safely evacuate you and your family from the house. Make a Meet Up Place!

Learn self-defense: This is not only from a physical stand point from the self confidence you gain from becoming Empowered over your own body. Attackers play on a victim’s vulnerability.

Let them take your stuff: They’re only there for your girl’s jewelry and expensive electronics…let them have at it! All of that stuff—ALL of it—is replaceable. You and your loved ones are not.

Don’t let them take you: As bleak as it sounds, whatever may happen to you wherever they take you will be far worse than what happens in the house. Be it by negotiation or by force, do not let home invaders take you or your loved ones.

Was this movie extreme, ehhhh I say yes but it was done correctly. It gained attention of everyone. The roles played by all characters can easily be reverse. Man home alone with his kids then a stranger knocks…

Justice For All

The month of May quietly, but swiftly, sneaked up on us. April brought us Sexual Assault Awareness Month as well as several interesting stories hovering through the news. In the last few days of April, 55 colleges throughout the U.S were named by the Department of Education as being under investigation for sexual assaults under Title IX. According to Title IX, “No person in the United States shall, on the basis of sex, be excluded from participation in, be denied the benefits of, or be subjected to discrimination under any education program or activity receiving federal financial assistance.” Many of the colleges listed are some of the most prestigious schools in the country such as Vanderbilt University, Princeton University, Harvard College, and University of Southern California, to name a few. This is a huge step in the right direction seeing as one out of every four college females claims they survived an attempted or completed sexual assault during their time at a campus. It’s wonderful to see the most influential leaders of our country stepping up for women all across the country. Even some celebrities are raising their voices on the issue:

Another recent development is the abduction of more than 250 school girls from a school in Nigeria. The world waits, holding its breath, to find out if these poor girls are safe. An Islamic terrorist group, Boko Haram, claimed responsibility for the kidnappings. What can you do to help? Get on Twitter and use the hashtag #BringBackOurGirls to raise awareness on the subject and to give some comfort to the victim’s families that you support them and hope for their daughter’s/sister’s/friend’s safe return. It may not seem like a lot, but the families of these girls, who might even be your age, need your support and love.

A Lesson On Crisis Intervention

Last Thursday, March 13, Divas In Defense was invited by representatives of NBC to join a screening of their new show Crisis. Crisis is a brand new television series which officially premiered on NBC last night. According to a summary written by NBC on Imdb.com‘s webpage the show “Centers on an idealistic Secret Service agent who finds himself at the center of an international crisis on his first day on the job. In his search for the truth, he will have to cross moral and legal lines as he navigates the highest levels of power and corruption.”

It was a fabulous experience and our very own Cole Parker and Skye Walton were asked to perform a self-defense demonstration prior to the screening. The duo did a brief, very educational, demonstration that left the audience amazed. Divas In Defense is the perfect place to learn how to approach a crisis situation, so be sure to sign up for one of our many classes designed to suit the beginning student to the most advanced student.

Thank you so much to NBC for inviting us!

Is It Time to Intervene Your Teen?

Signs of Dating Abuse In Teens

It’s hard to believe that we’re already into the month of February. In just two short weeks Valentine’s Day will arrive and many couples will celebrate with home-cooked meals for their significant other, heart-shaped boxes of chocolate, and large amounts of conversation hearts. Even though February is a love-filled month, it’s the perfect time to get educated about dating abuse; particularly teen dating abuse.

February is recognized by President Barack Obama as National Teen Dating Violence Awareness and Prevention month. One-in-four high school females have been sexually or physically abused, so chances are you have a friend or know someone in an abusive relationship. How can you tell? Here are a few of the signs:

– sudden isolation from friends
– bodily injuries like cuts or bruises
– dramatically different behavior around his/her boyfriend/girlfriend
– over-load of texts or calls from significant other wanting to know where they are
– excessive surveillance by significant other of texts or calls

If you or someone you know experiences any or all of these signs, don’t be afraid to seek help. Self-defense classes are an excellent way to stay prepared, even in a serious relationship. Divas In Defense offers such classes for teens and young adults, so please check out divasindefense.com for more information.

Visit www.loveisrespect.org for even more information about teen dating abuse statistics, the signs to look for, and how to seek proper help.

Don’t Be Scared, Be Prepared!

February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month

Countless crimes and attacks we see daily through the media can easily make us lose focus of the most common attackers and abusers, those we know. According to the United States Department of Justice, one- eight attacks on women is someone we DO NOT know. This means the other 87.5% are our fathers, brothers, bosses, co-workers, church members, neighbors and significant others.

Unfortunately, we do not always report our loved ones and those we know to local authorities. The inaccuracy of 87.5% truly being in the upper 90s reminds us of the importance of protecting ourselves and our girls.

One in four teen dating relationships are abusive. One in four college aged young women will experience attempted or completed rape. The fear of our little girls growing up is scary enough, even without the reality of the countless crimes they may have to endure. Don’t Be Scared, Be Prepared!

Click here for more information on registering you and/or a teen for self-defense classes.

How To: 6 Diva Tips for Stopping Stalkers

Did You Know One in Six Women Will Be A VICTIM of stalking?

Let me guess, you thought only celebrities had stalkers? Think again!

This growing epidemic which often leads to violence or murder, finally received its National recognition. On December 31, 2013, President Obama declared January as Stalking Awareness Month.

Here are 8 tips for you to protect yourself from being a victim of stalking:

1. Put a lock on your life!

Technology, although helpful, is a gateway to multiple types of crimes. We are often overly concerned with remembering our passwords, that we create less secure ones for our own comfort.
Create passwords that have high levels of security. Microsoft suggests having passwords with at least eight characters which DO NOT contain complete words.

2. They’re Free Anyway.

“Nothing in life is free.” Well, email can be! Using a simple “free email addresses” search on the web, we were able to find the “Top 11 Free Email Services” as of last month. Use multiple seperate email accounts for various purposes: personal bills and finances; a “sign up” account (for things you “sign up” for on the web); correspondence with family and friends; business

3. There Are No Reservations, You Do Not Have To Check In!

It’s understood how exciting it can be to stay social, using “selfies” and streaming video to connect with friends on the web. We strongly encourage not using the “check-in” feature on various apps to give your location until you are ready to depart. Apps like these keep an accurate account of your most visited areas making it easy to track and locate you.

4. Shredding Is Not Only For Cheese.

As hard as we try to be an eco-friendly Nation with electronic versions of everything; truth is, we still use paper. It would be understandably simple to mistake an overdue bill as junk mail when struggle is present. This is one of those good news, bad news scenarios. Good news: This too shall pass. Bad news: Personal Information and/or Identity Theft Invest in protecting your personal information, your local office supply store has inexpensive shredders (preferably one that shreds expired credit cards also)… Go get one!

5. Okay, You Are Cute! Now Put Your Badge Away!

If you are no longer at work, please take off your darn work badge. Do you realize having your name and workplace as a personal billboard is potentially life threatening? Someone can pose as a utility provider, mail man or jogger and have only those two things for you to feel comfortable enough to let down your guard if only for a few seconds. By calling your name and identifying where you work as a way to “me too” with you; those few seconds you are attempting to sort through your mental Contacts can allow an attacker to force his way into your home or you into his car.

6. Safeguard Your Smartphone

It’s funny how dumb our smartphones make us. Cell phones have evolved from a novelty to a necessity to many of us. Both parents and teens developed a dependency on them divulging every aspect of our lives willfully. It possesses our most personal photos; communication with family and friends and even our daily finances. If you could print all the information from your phone and put it in front of you, you would buy a vault to protect it. Add a simple pass code on your phone PIN, swipe or password to make your life line less accessible.

Find out how to “Prevent Your Ex From Cyber-Stalking“

April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month

April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month, also known as SAAM. The month of April is dedicated to providing events and opportunities to promote awareness of rape and sexual violence prevention. Sexual Assault Awareness Month was first observed in 2001 under the direction of the National Coalition Against Sexual Assault (NCASA).

The theme for the 2013 National Sexual Assault Awareness Month is “It’s Time . . . To Talk About It.” This year’s focus is on healthy sexuality and it’s connection to child sexual abuse prevention. We are asking you to join the conversation and help us promote the awareness of sexual assault in your communities.

Want to get involved but do not know where to start? Here are a few event ideas to get you started:

1. Start the conversation.

Plan a dinner, coffee meeting or lunch with people in your organizations or network to discuss sexual assault prevention and resources in your area.

2. Promote a teal ribbon campaign.

Teal is the color associated with sexual assault. Distribute teal ribbons to your co-workers, family members and friends to promote sexual assault awareness.

3. Walk, March, Unite.

Register for local walks or runs in your area focused on sexual assault awareness this month.

4. Participate in Denim Day.

Join the movement of wearing jeans on Denim Day, April 24. Wearing jeans on denim day is an international social statement and fashion statement as a visible means of protest against negative attitudes towards sexual assault. Click here to learn more about Denim Day.

Need more ideas and resources? Visit the National Sexual Violence Resource Center.

Categorized as: abduction